Fibromyalgia, parenting, love and loss

Working on Myself

I’m someone who has been actively paying attention here and there for a long time now to my patterns of thought, especially the negative patterns.  Self-improvement is important to me. Enlightenment is the goal. Yet, it can be easy to ruminate and get stuck. Chronic illness and the anxiety that often accompanies that illness compound the problem.

However, I am tired of being miserable. Yes, I am in pain. I have a great deal of stress, but so do many people. I have to make this life, illness and all, the best life it can be. By changing my thinking, I can change my reality. I’ve utilized EFT, or tapping, in the past. Yet, I haven’t done it regularly. I have been tapping more, and I am noticing a difference. While driving, I am listening to more upbeat music. I’m making self care more of a priority. Getting control over my emotions plays a huge part in my happiness. When a negative thought surfaces, I am now looking at it and finding the positive. If I can’t, then I am learning to accept what is and move forward anyway. This is a new, daily way of being. Sure, I’ve done similar things before, but eventually revert to old patterns. It feels different now. Maybe because I cannot take the anxiety and toxicity any longer. I’m simply done living that way.

If I consciously pay attention to each or at least most of my thoughts, then eventually I will not have to work so hard. It will become my natural state of being. That’s the hope, anyway.

Stay tuned!


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